The Only Ingredient You Need for Effective Feedback

We all need feedback to grow as a professional. Feedback help us understand what we need to keep doing (positive feedback) and what we need to improve (constructive feedback). Everyone loves positive feedback but sometimes the not-so-great feedback can sting a bit. Giving feedback, especially the not-so-great kind, is a bit of an art form, and it’s funny how even burgers can come into play. 😜

Here is a burger.

Here is another burger.

No offense, but in this case, the burgers are useless and so are other food references.

In my personal experience both as a feedback giver and receiver, what matters the most and the most effective is what Joey said (And yes, I am a woman 😏).

The goal or purpose of feedback is to facilitate positive change, ultimately fostering growth.

• Instead of: I have to give feedback because it’s company policy during our quarterly performance review cycle.
• Instead of: I’m upset with someone, so I feel compelled to speak up.

“As tennis coaches, we’re constantly providing feedback to players during training sessions. “Remember your ready position,” “Toss the ball higher,” “Recover, recover!” - these are just some of the instructions we give, and players take this feedback to improve their game. There’s no discomfort or hard feelings because our feedback comes from a place of care. That’s the secret revealed: care is the only ingredient needed for effective feedback and change. When we feel cared for and invested in, every word of constructive feedback becomes invaluable, like pieces of gold.

People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care ( ― Theodore Roosevelt)

I remember one afternoon at the tennis center when our head coach and I were casually chatting over coffee. He carefully discussed areas where my coaching sessions could improve and asked thought-provoking questions. His feedback was direct and centered on improvement without any unnecessary distractions. It ended up being the most beneficial feedback session I’ve experienced because I felt his genuine interest in my growth. I enjoyed that bunless burger with a sprinkle of actions.

I’m also grateful to all coaches that I worked with who timely nudges me to the right directions on court and all the players for your intelligent questions and timely feedback to help me make my coaching sessions better. Thank you!